Lily Collins and Her Signature Eyebrows (Glamour, Aug 2012)

, by aqessa

I like her! Since the first time I saw her in The Blind Side. See her interview with Glamour here:
Glamour: What'd you think when you found out Victoria had chosen you for this issue?
Lily Collins: I was so honored! I grew up adoring the Spice Girls. And you can't touch her when it comes to fashion. She owns every outfit she wears. I don't know how she handles all of those kids—and in heels!
Glamour: What's your approach with makeup?
LC: Less is more. When I travel to Europe, I go days without putting anything on. It feels healthier. I just never understood the idea of caking it on. The more you have on your face, the more there is to smudge and go wrong.
Glamour: Your eyebrows have become your signature. How does it feel to have one part of your body be so obsessed over?
LC: Big brows weren't the look in L.A., where I grew up. But my mom instilled in me that it's the quirky things that make you beautiful.

Glamour: You've worked with the most beautiful women in Hollywood. Picked up any tips?
LC: With Sandra Bullock, Julia Roberts, Julianne Moore, and Jennifer Connelly, they weren't fussy with hair and makeup. They all exude this inner and outer beauty. I learned that no matter how big you get, it's still important not to let anything go to your head.
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Teen Vogue Fashion Photography

, by aqessa

Photography created to make you feel something everytime you see the picture. It captures life. Since the first time i read Teen Vogue, I fall in love with its fashion photography. They usually using a professional and senior photographer. No doubt the pictures always look stunning!

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We Are Not Afraid of Death, We Are Afraid to Leave Without Saying Goodbye

, by aqessa

"We're not afraid to death. We are afraid to leave without saying goodbye."

Photo from: Flickr

A few days ago I heard a news from Grandma that my nanny when I was a kid passed away last month. Nobody told us when she passed away, Grandma knew when she visited her house in Sukabumi and when she asked about my nanny to the neighbors, they told her that Bibi (that's how I called her) has passed away last month. Grandma told Mum, and Mum told us a few days later after she was back from Sukabumi.

We are shocked and sad.

Nobody could believe when people they knew suddenly passed away. It's been a very very very long time never heard about her, never seen her, never try to visit her house when we're in Sukabumi. Last time I met her was high school I guess. She wasn't work for us anymore, she was just visited my house while she was in my town. And she met my first boyfriend, and she said he looked like some Indonesian soap opera actor hahaha.

There were very tough year for her. When one of her son passed away. The son who was ill that time because he fell down from tree, who gave her reason to leave my family. And we met her son, he couldn't sit, couldn't talk, even breathing was hard for him I guess. The son that she brought to our home once when I was a kid, sister usually fought with him because of some toys. God had plan, God took him. She was back to my family but she wasn't as strong as she used to. And she left again. And her other son worked for my dad, and he left my dad, and he tried to suicide. She was a widow, divorced from her husband. Can't believe how hard her life back then. And finally somebody told us that she became a traditional wedding singer in her village. I think she was happy. Grew old with her daughters and sons and grandchildren and didn't work as maid anymore. She successfully educated her daughters and sons became a worker, not a maid like her.

She taught me a lot. She was like my secondary parents at home. She took care of me and my sister. She was the one who taught me that "Don't think too much about small things". She helped my parents rise me. Suddenly I remember the song that she always sing, it wasn't dangdut music, it was religious music. I remember she asked if she can keep the cassette for herself or not, and my sister gave it to her. The lyrics was like "Sepohon kayu daunnya rimbun, lebat bunganya serta buahnya. Walaupun hidup seribu tahun kalau tak sembahyang apa gunanya? Walaupun hidup seribu tahun kalau tak sembahyang apa gunanya?" ("A leafy tree, with a lot of flowers and fruits. What's the purpose of living if you're not pray though you live for a thousand years?"). I will always keep that on my mind and my heart, Bik.

Some people said that it's better if people died because of illness, at least we are ready if someday they're gone. At least they are saying goodbye. At least we are saying goodbye.
She never say goodbye to us. That's why in my religion we should have to keep 'tali silaturahmi' to all people we know.

One day when I was a kid, I promised to her that I will give her a gift when I grown up and already have job someday. And now, this is the Someday. I don't get a chance to do my promise because she's already gone. I told my Mum about this and she said just give the gifts to her daughters and sons and grandchildren. Yes I will. And I pray for her, may God forgive all her sins, may God accepts all her pray, may God gives her the best place in heaven. Amen.

I also remember once she said "We shouldn't cry at the funeral. But I don't know why the tears always comes." Now I understand what she meant. Because no one saying goodbye when they are gone. Even saying goodbye is not enough. Because there're no "See you later" in the end of the phrase.
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Fake Friends? Are They Really Fake?

, by aqessa

"People are usually afraid with fake friends."
Photo taken from Tumblr

Mereka bilang teman yang muncul ketika ada maunya aja. Tapi setelah gue pikir-pikir, fake friends versi gue adalah teman yang literally nyari gue kalau butuh doang lalu badmouthing (bukan sekedar ngomongin ya) di belakang dan berteman dengan gue hanya untuk mencari informasi yang dapat digunakan untuk mengolok-olok. Bedakan orang yang sekedar ngomongin lo di belakang dengan orang yang ngomongin lo dan berteman dengan lo hanya untuk mencari-cari hal yang bisa mereka olok-olok di belakang.

Nggak ada yang salah dengan mencari teman ketika kita butuh. Lho, memang bukannya salah satu manfaat berteman seperti itu? Yang salah ketika temannya ngarep kebaikannya dibalas. Memangnya setiap berteman harus deket sampai ngomong dari hati ke hati baru dibilang 'real friends'? Memangnya nggak boleh orang curhat ke orang lain kalau kita sedang annoying buat mereka? Besides, there are a few stages in friendship: Acquintance (sekedar kenal), Friends (yang nyari kalau memang butuh atau kepingin aja atau lagi kepikiran aja), Good Friends (teman-teman yang memang sering main bareng dan cukup akrab), Best Friends (teman yang tau dan bisa menerima sebenar-benarnya kita). Why we are too afraid with fake friends? Afraid of people who's just using us? Are we afraid of brokenheart after we expect them to treat us as good as the way we treat them? I think the main problem is... we expect too much in friendship.

It's not how they're talking about you behind your back. It's how their action after talking about you behind your back. If they still accept you as their friend, they are good friends. But if they're being your friend just to make fun of you and using you, well, they're fake.
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Be Kind, Even To Those Who Are Not

, by aqessa

"Be kind, even to those who are not."
Photo taken from Tumblr

Got the quote from somewhere in Path, and damn love it. Then I remember those rude people, judging, ignoring, badmouthing behind your back, etc. Happened to me back then, and I think I was mature enough that time. Gue selalu bertanya "Apa yang salah sama gue? Why didn't they tell me and I'll explain why later? Kenapa gue nggak boleh jadi orang yang bebas mengekspresikan apa yang gue rasakan? Kenapa gue nggak boleh bebas berkomentar apaaa aja yang terlintas di otak gue? Apa yang salah dengan gue? They don't even know what happened to me, what I've been through!" entah kenapa gue nggak ada perasaan "They did that because they were jealous" mungkin karena gue merasa kayaknya nggak ada yang bisa di iriin dari gue saat itu. Gue jadi orang yang nggak percaya diri, karena selalu bertanya "apakah gue menjijikan kalau kayak gini?" people sometimes doesn't realize what kind of damage that they've just made. Listen people, be careful when you accidentally hurt people, you never know what kind of damage you've just made to others. Apalagi kalau kita masih masa-masa pembentukan jati diri.

Kemudian gue belajar dan menyadari bahwa tidak semua orang punya skill berempati, menerima pendapat, dan mengerti. Yes, it's a skill. Sometimes I thought, if they need me one day, I'll refuse. But turns out, I can't act like that. I don't say that I'm a good person, tapi gue kadang gampang kasian dengan orang lain ketika gue mencoba memposisikan sebagai mereka. 

One day, gue menjadi tokoh antagonisnya. Gue pun berlaku seperti those rude people ke pacar gue. You know those quotes from We Heart It or Tumblr that sounds like "My attitude depends on how you treat me." I prepared myself for that, but my boyfriend is really really really a nice and kind and good person, he never treat me bad after all. I felt so embarassed to him. And since then he taught me indirectly that 'never stop being kind even to those who are not, if there still good things in their heart, they must be feel so bad and embarassed that they ever treat us like shit.'

Besides, doesn't it feel better when you're smile and kind to people? I mean, can't you feel it in your deepest heart how goooood it is? Dan setelah banyak belajar, sumber penyakit itu dari hati. So I think, be kind for your health, for your inner peace, even to those who are not.
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